Pancake Lady gets served all wrong

It's been a couple of weeks since I got to the physical therapy office to work out in the wellness program. First, I had a cold that Peggy and I passed back and forth, and then we were away, so I hadn't been there for far too long. When I got there and saw my favorite tech, herein referred to by the code name Pancake Lady, she said, "Where have you been? You missed all the drama!"

Oh, my, we can't have that! As both a lover and an amateur chronicler of human events, I was all ears, and as soon as she finished with a group of women doing aquatic exercises, she came over and related the story, which, again, tells a lot about young men of the day and how they treat young women despicably.

Having just got out of a relationship that really wasn't even supposed to happen, she was in a bit of a spin, I suppose, and rebounded back to someone she had gone with before. That hadn't worked out the first time, because the guy - let's call him Harry's Son - had gone back to his old flame Paula (not Abdul, one can only hope.) But! just as Pancake Lady became free of the relationship with a guy who had been a friend-friend and insisted on becoming a boy-friend, with the result of suffocating Pancake, who shows up but dirty Harry's Son, and guess what!? He is free and clear of Paula, who is so far in his past that even with the magnifying rear-view mirror, she is smaller than a speck of dust, and even less important.

Unemcumbered, young and free, the two fell into a giddy whirlwind of courtship. It was all happening for them - dinner on the run, fun things to do, school, work, ball games as spectators and as participants - right on through this past Sunday, which she describes as " the perfect date on the perfect day." Almost as an aside, as they sat reliving the happiest Sunday they had ever known, he mentioned that he had to run up to Paula's and pick up some stuff he had left behind there.

Attention daters of all ages: take this advice. Unless you are absolutely sure of the permanence of your hot thing with someone, don't leave behind anything that you couldn't easily replace with a trip to Ollie's Bargain Outlet. Your CorningWare, your E-Z-Ice'R cooler that holds 2 sixes and a liter of Asti Spumante, all this stuff can be gotten again and it's less painful than going around to his or her house with a big empty cardboard paper towel box in your trunk. Do NOT leave irreplaceable CDs, family photos, or stock certificates, because you never can tell. Ask Ms Pancake!

So on Monday, Harry Jr drives up I-95 to where all the Paulas live, and starts texting back to his One True Love that he is successfully retrieving his Tupperware and will be on the toll road of love just as soon as traffic allows. After work, she stops over at his place, and he does the one thing that males do that tips off the opposite sex that they have something very important to discuss.

He turns OFF the TV.

And tells her that he was only using her to get Paula jealous, and it must have worked, because looky here, he and Paula are just as close and cuddly as a couple of sparrows in the cornfield. Pancake felt her foot go into an involuntary twitch, and the color drained from her face, and the smile went away faster than a Good Humor bar on the 4th of July. She was cast as The Other Woman by this cad, this rogue, this scoundrel, this rake, this bounder, this heel, this knave, this churl.

He used her, and right now he thinks he is right where he wants to be - Paula is dancing to his tune, because she sees that he can step right out and get grooving with other women, and he has no more need for Pancake. But Harrison, my man, the day is gonna come when the wheel of karma comes spinning around and knocks you right down. It happens. I've seen it happen. And, buddy boy, it's a-gonna happen to you. And our Miss Pancake is far too nice a lady to extract any joy from the pain that will catch up with you at some disputed barricade down life's road. I wish for the same level of magnanimity, but you hurt my friend, pal. Someone has to pony up for that. You see, it doesn't matter who you are or how great you look or what you do or how rich you are - there is always someone who will come along and have just enough of you, and dump you. Then you'll know why my friend cried.