Monday, July 15, 2013

Let 'em eat TastyKakes

There's a frenzy afoot in the nation, and if you've ever had a frenzied foot, you know what I mean!  Twinkies are coming back!  It's that yellowy cakey treaty thing with the "creme" filling that can be used as spackle in case your brother-in-law cracks a hole in the wall hanging up his picture of him getting voted into the National Honor Society ( a photo of spurious authenticity, what with him dropping out in 8th grade to pursue the carny life.)

People of all walks of life and all girths are waxing rhapsodic about these little cake-like starch tubes, which were first baked by Dolley Madison as the White House burned down in 1814. It was in the paper not long ago when the Hostess Company went under rather than pay a decent wage, and some other firm bought up the precious right to churn out these jaundice-colored belly grenades, and they will be back on the shelves down at the Try 'N' Save this coming week.

With millions of culinary sins dotting my life and my files at the HMO, one thing that I can't be charged with is ever eating any Hostess products at all.  Twinkies, Ho-Hos, Chocodiles, Ding Dongs, Donettes, Fruit Pies, Ho Hos, Mini Muffins or Zingers have never been part of my diet.

And that's because I am from Ball-tee-more, Murland, hon, and we eat TastyKakes here.

Or we eat tofu.

TastyKake goodies include Cupcakes, Krimpets – butterscotch iced or jelly filled, Kandy Kakes, Juniors - a tiny little layer cake iced with chocolate or coconut, and the amazing little pies, a staple of my lunchbox from first grade thru twelfth.

They are vastly superior to Hostess and I recommend them, although I haven't had any of them since Carter was in office. Tastes change and we all grow up, but I have my memories.

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