Roger Miller, master songwriter, composed "You Can't Roller Skate in a Buffalo Herd, " but Miller, the pride of Erick, Oklahoma, never met this fool who...went to Yellowstone National Park and kicked a bison in the leg.
OF COURSE the 40-year-old buffalo botherer was drunk. He received minor injuries and wound up in jail for being under the influence of alcohol, disorderly conduct, and approaching and disturbing wildlife.
You're not supposed to do that. You know that, which is why you're not at Jellystone being arrested by Ranger Smith right now, but hot-a-mighty, what is wrong with people that they just can't stop being the south end of northbound horses?
This galoot's friend was driving him around the park, and he got pinched for driving under the influence, failing to yield to a police car, and disturbing wildlife.
They're both the twin prides of Idaho Falls, Idaho. Isn't that the state where a lot of these fact-denying misfits have settled?
Bison, which are different from buffalos because they have a different name (same as alligators and crocodiles) are some big huggers. Males can run up to 2,000 pounds, and speaking of running, they sprint at 40 mph, which is faster than you and I, trust me. They are the biggest land mammals in North America, and no one can stop them from going swimming, so don't even try.
Best advice - go to the park, enjoy the sights, stay sober, and don't bother the wildlife. It never ends well.
1 comment:
He’s lucky the bison didn’t gore him.
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