A little ruff on the soccer field

 They're getting ready to have soccer games in Canada as part of the World Cup, featuring humans from Canada and nations all over the globe.  And geese from Canada. They fly overhead and might even land on the field (the "pitch," as soccer fans call it) and however they travel, they are bound to leave their little ...biscuits behind.

That's no way to play important games of soccer ("football," as soccer fans call it), having to dodge geese droppings. 

Canadians being infinitely resourceful (they found a way to make Geddy Lee and Rush famous), the grounds crew at a  World Cup practice pitch in Etobicoke’s Centennial Park found a way to keep the field unpoopulated.

They use dogs, working canines employed by Border Control Bird Dogs, out of  Sterling, Ontario.

Soccer dog "Ben" reporting for duty

This is Gareth Williams's business. He has taught the hounds to "haze" the geese, instead of chasing them. Williams says this “reeducates” the birds. By convincing the geese that there are predators in the area, this keeps them away, so it's considered a humane way of keeping birds off grassy areas.

“The dogs crouch down and stalk the geese, as they would traditionally for sheep and moving livestock,” Williams told CTV News Toronto. “Geese then start thinking the border collies are predators in that area, and it encourages them to leave.”

Williams has a five-dog squad that he dispatches around the province, at golf courses, schools, cemeteries, and any other type of large, open green space. The premise is that "they’re fighting nature with nature, ” as he puts it.

Down here in the states, we would just send hoodlum dogs to tell the geese to "get outta town if you know what's good for you, see?" They're more restrained north of the border!

Sunday Rerun: If you can't say something nice...

  Oh, how nice it would be if talented people were allowed to enjoy their lives, sharing their blessings and making people happy. 

I'm thinking of Karen Carpenter, the singer who performed with her brother Richard in the 70s and 80s. Her velvety contralto voice sweetened the air as The Carpenters had hit after hit. She comes to mind today because I read an interview with the late great Hal Blaine, the drummer who kept the beat on the greatest songs of the rock and roll era. 

As Karen and Richard began making records, she was the drummer, and his keyboards provided accompaniment to her divine singing. But her drumming, although good, was not great, and Herb Alpert, head of their record company, brought Blaine in to spice up the beat.

Hal arrived at the studio to find opposition from...the mother of Karen and Richard, who sought to make the decisions, musical and otherwise, for the duo. Blaine said that Mrs Carpenter was telling Richard he was the star, and had little regard for Karen's talent. She wanted him in the spotlight and Karen behind the drums, while she was ten times better as a singer than drummer. 

They wound up making great records, but Karen was never made to feel worthy. No wonder she developed the eating disorder that would cut her life way too short.

No one asked me for advice, but if you have a child who displays talent at some creative venture, how about encouraging them, and urging them to do their best? Why hurt them by belittling them?

The Saturday Picture Show, June 13, 2026

 

You never know what you're going to find when you tear out some old drywall. Someone finished their quart of lunch and walled off the evidence. 

Do you want to tell her? I didn't think so! 

This is from a sandwich shop in Vancouver, Canada. They really know how to draw the celebrities! Liam showed up for his free sammy.

I admit, I stole the joke, but I once left a message for someone who worked for another County office, stating "Arrived Venice, streets flooded, please advise." It was Robert Benchley's gag a hundred years ago, and yet it still fooled someone in Towson, Maryland, 40 years ago.

Speaking of county employees, it seems that about half of the retirees have decamped for sunny Florida. Not I, and this is why. The closest we come to this beast is some of our larger mosquitoes.

This sign says "NO BIKE PARKING" in Dutch. So here are people scoffing at it in two languages. Meanwhile, the only Dutch word I know is "treat."

The water of the Pacific ocean created this arch in Maui. It took time, sure, but it's way to remind us to be patient with nature and with ourselves.

This will make a nice free wallpaper this week, especially for someone such as I who loves red barns, the older the better.

When you think about the creation of the universe (and you should!) remember that decision was made as to how many gills (or lamellae) should go under the head of a mushroom. 

A couple of drivers' test examiners are going to have great times at dinner if someone asks them if anything interesting happened at work today.

I think I'll call myself "Judge Knott"

The guy who got between me and my goal (the checkout line at LIDL) wanted to bend my ears awhile about how man disrespects God by thinking we are as smart as He is.

I don't think that. I don't even think I'm as smart as the Pope, but I saw no point in having a theological discussion with this guy, so I took a clever shortcut around him and started piling my goods on the belt.

He pulled out all the greatest hits ("God will not be mocked," "Judge not lest ye be judged") but he found no willing dialog partner in me. I was there for paper supplies, foamy hand soap, bacon, and toothpaste, and I paid for all that and scooted out the door. Loaded up the car and went to back up, and there stood a woman directly behind my car. I did that thing where you put it in park and back into reverse to catch her attention, but then I noticed she was intently listening to that same man. After he stowed his purchases, he took her cart and put it right in the middle of a parking spot. Together, they piled into their car and creaked off, presumably in search of more people to annoy.

Not the actual cart!

God never told anyone to leave their cart in the middle of the consarned parking lot, either. It's annoying that people who have so much to say about everything can't abide by the simplest of niceties.

Support Group

Donkeys know what I, and countless others who dodder around on aging legs, know, and that is, you can't beat a nice pair of support socks. Soccer players wear special socks that prevent slipping, wick away sweat, and cushion the feet to prevent cramping.

Donkeys would also agree that the Arsenal Football Club is not only a perennial winner but also a generous group of humans. They saw that they had tons of unworn socks sitting around in the locker room, and donated them to the Redwings Horse Sanctuary, the largest horse welfare society in Britain. Donkeys now clamber around wearing socks that both protect their legs and help them to heal from injuries.

“It’s really one of the most unusual donations we’ve ever had,” said Nicola Knight, the sanctuary’s head of communications and campaigns. She deals with around 1,000 equines, none of whom have indicated a preference for socks other than red ones. Horses rarely complain!

And besides the comfort of having the leg muscles wrapped up tightly, donkeys and horses don't have to worry about horseflies biting their legs, or keeping bandages on tight, or holding their leg hair back when they go in for a nice hoof trim. AND employees at the Sanctuary hide bananas and ginger cookies in the socks as treats for the herds.

So, Ms Knight says, “We hope they’re going to make a real difference."

So don't look a gifted horse in the mouth!

 

McWreck

You know, they say the French are the greatest gastronomes among us. They love their chow, and they are proud of the way they cook it, even though it's all glopped up in goo that leaves no room for hot sauce.

But even the French are subject to the laws, both of traffic and of physics, which brings us to the case of a French guy who was tying on the old McDonald's feedbag last week in Sydney,  Australia, and paying more attention to the food in his bag than to the fountain he ran into down under.

"Strangely, he was still eating Macca's there", said Police Inspector Anderson Lessing. The article I read did not specify whether the unnamed man, 21, was charged with culinary crimes or just with traffic offenses. He reversed an SUV into the Archibald Fountain in downtown Sydney's Hyde Park in the early hours of Wednesday morning, and the sad results of the driving mishap are to be seen below.

"Half of it was sticking inside, and half it was sticking out, with the driver still inside," Lessing told local radio station 702 ABC Sydney. I suppose he meant half of the car.

The man was uninjured, except for whatever pride he had before he drove off. Police refused to say what he was delivering.

 

 

Jeeves whiz

Jeeves, I am sorry, we forgot about you, and now you are gone!

Back in the wacky 90s, when we wanted to find out the capital of Brazil, or when the next Die Hard movie was coming out, or how many cups of sugar to add to a recipe, we hooked up the computer and Asked Jeeves, the online butler and keeper of all information.

Jeeves, and his home, Ask.com, are now shuttered forever. Things come and go in the world of commerce, and to be honest, most of us forgot ever going to Jeeves, since Google, and to a lesser degree, Yahoo, came along.

“To you — the millions of users who turned to us for answers in a rapidly changing world — thank you for your endless curiosity, your loyalty, and your trust,” the company said in a notice posted on its now-defunct website.

Remember him?

It was 1996 when the screens first lit up with a character that could help us find answers. Jeeves was a character in a series of books by P. G. Wodehouse. David Warthen and Garrett Gruener were a couple of early-PC days smart guys. They saw a need for what came to be called a "search engine," and they developed Jeeves for us.

I think I can remember switching over to Google because it felt like giving up the toy tools we all had to fix things - wee screwdrivers, tiny tack hammers - for real professional gear.  Google does us fine, but I am sitting here wondering if Jeeves's feelings were hurt when we abandoned him....