Friday, October 28, 2016

Everyone's a judge

Mike Nudelman and Shana Lebowitz wrote an interesting article in the Business Insider website called "9 small things you do that people use to judge your personality."

So, since I didn't already have enough to worry over, I read it. And now I am sizing myself up in 9 new ways. Let's look over the list! By the way, Nudelman and Lebowitz got a lot of research from Quora, an interesting site to pose and answer questions.  

The list:

1. Your handshake.

Everyone knows a person with a weak "wet fish" handshake tends to be wimpish and feeble.  As soon as you clasp their paw, you can't wait to get it back so you can apologize to your own.  

But the bruiser who habitually crushes walnuts in his hand and then shakes yours is not so great either.  With him, you want to get your hand back ASAP so you can wrap an icepack around it.

Good advice is to go for a handshake right in the middle of those two.  Best advice is to forgo the shake and do the fist bump.

2. Your punctuality.

When I was a supervisor, I used to shake my melon in surprise at how many people would show up late - not just for work, but for the job interview in the first place! Many of us seem to take a very casual approach to showing up on time. Most people who are in charge of things don't. If you catch my drift...

3. Your handwriting.

My father would leave me notes listing chores, etc, and the notes themselves should be in the Calligraphy Museum, so precise were the letters.  My mother won handwriting awards for the Palmer Method all through high school.  My handwriting looks like when you're trying out a new cheap ballpoint pen. I know I lose points on this score.  

4. Your favorite color.

Mine is brown, plain brown, like the color of a suede jacket, or a brownie (so THAT'S why them call them that!) and while that marks me (so THAT'S why they call me that!) as hopelessly dull and square, at least I don't have to explain liking "wenge," "celedon," or "sarcoline."  Runner-up for me is fuchsia, because it's just one typo away from being hilarious.

5. Your taste in music.

Hank Snow (1914- 1999)
Again, I'm in trouble here.  It would be better if I could say that my favorite tune was "Pachelbel's Canon in D" or that other song with the cannons. But if you're sizing me up and I tell you my favorite songs include "90 Miles an Hour (Down a Dead-end Street") by Hank Snow and the Rainbow Ranch Boys and "Meet Mister Callaghan" by Les Paul and Mary Ford, you might walk away shaking your head, as have thousands before you.

Would liking "They All Laughed" by Ozzie Nelson and His Orchestra help any?

6. Your eye contact.

Do you look people in the eye when you speak to them? People think you are weak-willed and unlikely to follow through on assignments in a dependable manner if your gaze wanders to their shoulders or down the street. And for heaven's sake, don't ever get caught being told, "My EYES are UP HERE!"

7. Your choice of pet.

Where you come down on this issue says a lot. Some love dogs and dislike cats, or vice versa. Some like fish, hermit crabs, parakeets, or ferrets. Safest way to have people really like you is to have two of everything and change your name to Noah.

8. Whether you bite your nails.

Let's consider a person's overall grooming and appearance.  He or she can be well-dressed, well-coiffed, well-shod and well, nice to look at, but if you see their fingernails all chewed like the ends of #2B pencils during a math test, it takes away points.  

9. How you ask a question.

I was in one of those sensitivity training classes many years ago when the "facilitator" (that's the term they use to mean "person who makes you feel inadequate until it's time to go home, and then asks how to find their way back to the parking garage") said that any time one asks a question that starts with the word "Why," it "automatically puts the other person on the defensive and is a sure-fire way to get them to stop sharing."

I raised my hand and said, "Why?"

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