Barbara
Ehrenreich wrote a book entitled "Nickel and Dimed," which is all about
the current economy. She showed how hard it is to get by on the
minimum wage by going out there in the workplace and doing it! It wasn't
always successful, but she wanted to see if she could at least pay for a
place to live, transportation, and food, off a low-paying job such as
serving food, cleaning hotel rooms, being a dietary aide and residential
housekeeping.
I don't think I would like to replicate
her efforts; being comfortably ensconced as I am in my happy life means I
don't think I'd do well living out of a rented room in Podunk and
earning 6 bucks at MegaMart. But reading this book got me to thinking
about three jobs I could do and three jobs I WISH I could do.
F'rinstance, I would love to be a sub shop guy.
There will be those who have been sub shop guys or gals who will say,
"Oh nuh-uh you wouldn't!" but maybe for a short period it would be fun
to make cold and hot subs and pizzas. Unless people got really picky
and started telling me just how much mayonnaise they wanted, or to hold
the fried onions on the cheese steak. I guess I'm saying I would like
to have a sub shop to make subs for me and Peggy, but maybe that's
impractical.
Waiter or server, yeah, I could try
that. I believe that someone tried to float the word "waitron" as a
unisex word for all who schlep food out of a restaurant kitchen and over
to a table, but it seems that most people are sticking with "server." I
do love to talk to people who do this. They all have several hundred
stories about good and bad customers, and if they have a second, they
are only too glad to share the stories. You have to know when to ask,
though.
Cab driver is something else I could
try, as long as we can rule out armed robberies, drunk passengers,
passengers who hop out of the cab without paying and run like thieves,
and drunks who would rob me and then run like thieves. Not good. But,
take away the unpleasant aspects of any job, and it looks like a bowl of
berries. I just think that pushing a hack around would give me the
chance to meet some interesting pedestrians and show them my extensive
collection of shortcuts and ways to get around our county. I don't
think I'd take any fares into the city, at least its more crime-ridden
areas. But I could tell people why they should stay out here in the
boonies, and we'd both be better off!
Any list of three jobs I could never land but think they would be fun to get would start with major league baseball first-base coach
because this non-stressor mainly involves greeting members of my team
who have successfully reached first base, reminding them not to leave
for second until I say so, and picking up foul balls to toss to happy
kids in the stands. And to think, people get paid to do this!
Being president of the United States of America
would be a gas too, if only for the apoplectic state it would induce in
my many critics who claim I am too liberal for words. Imagine their
faces when I start my term with promotions such as "Turn-In-Your-Gun
Tuesday" and "Vice-President For a Day"!
There is no doubt at all that the coolest and easiest job of the high-paying jobs is movie director
and what fun that must be, huh! You get to stand in a room full of
glamorous people who have their lines all memorized, and the sound
effects person is ready, and the camera people and everyone else, and
then you go "Action!" and everyone acts and then later you show up at
the premiere wearing a beret and a tuxedo jacket over blue overalls and
talk about your "craft" and the difficulties of being an authentic
"auteur." Occasionally, a new or nervous actor will ask you what is
their motivation in some scene. You just tell them their motivation is
to say all their words in a reasonably convincing manner and not fall
over the ottoman in the living room scene. And then you start thinking
about what to have for dinner at some swanky H'wood bistro later.
Nice to dream, ain't it?
No comments:
Post a Comment