Thursday, February 9, 2012

One Million, Give or Take

Attention, One Million Moms:  How come there are only 40,000 of you on your Facebook page?  How is that a million?  

These goofballs who called themselves One Million Moms, a part of the bizarre American Family Association, are urging people to make nuisances of themselves.  You go on the website of this AFA, and they're busy asking you to call Home Depot stores and ask for the manager and annoy him or her by engaging them in bickering about how horrible it is that the Home Depot supports the right of people to love whom they wish.

That makes me want to stop off at the Depot on the way home and buy some 2x4s, maybe even some 4x8s.
I took this right off the AFA website:

Last week we reported that Home Depot appeared to be pulling back its support to homosexual activists. We spoke too soon. Immediately after we released our findings, Home Depot said it will continue to support homosexual activities.

And I find this to be true.  I needed to run by the Depot last week for some hinges, and right there in the aisles, homosexual activity abounded. I was shocked. Shocked! I lumbered on over to where they keep the lumber, trying to buy some shelving, but the aisle was blocked off because some clerks and customers had formed an impromptu chorus line, doing a tribute to the Liberace Era.
Homosexual Activities.  How silly a term. I mean, when I go to the lumber yard or the Dollar Tree for my shower supplies, no one calls that a "heterosexual activity."  When Peggy and I sidle into "our" booth at the fabulous Double-T Diner, I don't think of that as a "heterosexual activity."  And even when we have heterosexual activity, I don't think of it as "heterosexual activity." 

So, if you're gay and you work at the Home Depot, selling me paint or drill bits is a homosexual activity, and my painting the kitchen window frame or drilling a pilot hole to hang a picture is a heterosexual activity.  What's the diff?

Now, the self-righteous have turned on Ellen DeGeneres, and they're asking that we call our local JC Penney and heckle the manager and threaten to boycott the store and say any number of bad things about their towels and sheets and t-shirts. The Many Moms said that J.C. Penney was trying to gain a new target market by "jumping on the pro-gay bandwagon" by hiring Ellen to promote their merchandise.

"They  wanted to get me fired and I am proud and happy to say that J.C. Penney stuck by their decision to make me their spokesperson," Ellen said.
This is what you look like when you let others do your thinking for you.

I am proud to report that I have been walking this earth for 60 years, and during all that time, not one person who ever drove by me on their "pro-gay bandwagon" tried to force me to jump aboard with them and ride around town. Each and every gay person I have ever met left me alone with my preference, and I have tried to reciprocate by letting them do as they like as well.

See you at Penneys and Home Depot!   


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