Sunday, September 21, 2008

I Told Sarah Palin, "Theeeeenks but nooooe theeeeenks"


Seem like a nice couple...Papa John and Cruella

I got schooled and now I understand. To think what a fool I was, not to see the clear-cut superiority of a nasty old man and his trophy veep. But thanks to my friend Carole, who passed the following along to me, I no longer have to wallow in ignorance. Also, thanks to Carole, I can go enjoy the Ravens being 2-0 without having to come up with my own daily blogfiller! Thanks, Carole. I thought it was funny the other day when old McCain accused Obama of being a Washington insider, when all along he's been saying the man from Illinois was too new and inexperienced. You can count on me to pass this valuable information along to my friends Oak, Algebra and Turf!


*Now* I understand McCain and Palin

* If you grow up in Hawaii, raised by your grandparents, you're "exotic, different."

* If you grow up in Alaska eating moose burgers, you're a quintessential American story.

* If your name is Barack, you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim.

* If you name your kids Willow, Trig and Track, you're a maverick.

* If you graduate from Harvard Law, you are unstable.

* If you attend 5 different small colleges before graduating, you're well grounded.

* If you spend 3 years as a brilliant community organizer, become the first black
President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, spend 8 years as a State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, become chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, spend 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of 13 million people while sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you don't have any real leadership experience.

* If your total resume is: local weather girl, 4 years on the city council and 6 years as
the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, 20 months as the governor of a state with only 650,000 people, then you're qualified to become the country's second highest ranking executive.

* If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years while raising 2 beautiful
daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're not a real Christian.

* If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left your disfigured wife and
married the heiress the next month, you're a Christian.

* If you teach responsible, age appropriate sex education, including the proper use of
birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.

* If, while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with no other option in sex
education in your state's school system, while your unwed teen daughter ends up pregnant, you're very responsible. And you try to make victimized women pay for their own rape kits.

* If your wife is a Harvard graduate lawyer who gave up a position in a prestigious law firm
to work for the betterment of her inner city community, then gave that up to raise a family, your family's values don't represent America's.

* If your husband is nicknamed "First Dude", with at least one DWI conviction and no
college education, who didn't register to vote until age 25 and once was a member of a group that advocated the secession of Alaska from the USA, your family is extremely admirable.

* If you claim to be an advocate for special needs children, and then cut the Special Olympics budget in half, you're a sensible and sensitive haaaaackey mohhhhhm.

OK, *much* clearer now.

Author unknown but deserving of a big hand!

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