Take a breath and try to hold on!

The recent round of blizzards here in Baltimore, hon, have left their mark on society, mainly in the form of Titanic-sized parking lot icebergs that are seriously being considered for their own zip codes. I mean, these huggers are huge, and with the temps hanging around the freezing point all week, there's not much thawing going on yet.

A note to all you news anchors who gaze wistfully at the meteorologists and ask for the temps to warm up to about 70° - I'm glad that you don't really affect the weather. In 1996 we had one blizzard and then a fast warmup, and then we had flooding like Noah had to deal with, just about.

But I am starting to see the little signs of our emotional fabric being rent. Things like honking horns, extended middle fingers and shouted curses are sure signs that a certain few of us are getting nervous in the service. I guess it all comes down to this: the roads are narrow, the intersections are blocked by boulders the size of Delaware, and once one reaches one's destination, forget about parking. Most of the spots are being used to park snow until, maybe, August.

I see the City went and hired a Snow Dragon from Canada - some sort of mechanical super melter, turning snow into water. This must be the reverse of those machines that turn water into snow for the ski slopes. Maybe that's why so many of us are agitated: we never want what we have.

Lenny Bruce said it best. The man who said, "There's nothing sadder than an aging hipster..I'm 34 and already I can't relate to Fabian" also said that one generation works hard to get the money to buy rubber boots for their kids, and their kids dig running barefoot in the mud. There's snow on the ground, and it's cold outside, and no amount of caterwauling will change the scenario. So let's enjoy what we have when we have it, and let old Mother Nature have her way.

But I do have to say that I'm pretty sure I can see Russia from my kitchen window. How's that reading-all-the-newspapers and magazines thing working out for ya?