Monday, August 1, 2022

Horrible pay, but you are off on Sundays

To be quite honest, as I always am, it's not the super piety that annoys me about Chick-fil-A. I mean, their "We're so religious, we're closed on Sunday, but you sinners just go right on over to McDonald's or something" is pretty sad, and their charitable endeavor, the WinShape Foundation, donated millions of dollars to organizations seen by LGBT activists as hostile to LGBT rights.  As a longtime stockholder in the firm of Live & Let Live, this offends me.

And I ate lunch there one day with an old friend who assured me I would love it. In the hour lunch break that we shared, I guess I spent about 10 minutes talking to him. The rest of the time, I had to deal with the hyped-up hostess, who kept bopping over to our table every 37 seconds to see if there was "Any little thing I can do for you all!" 

But I am not so pure of spirit that I would drive past Home Depot if I needed some lag bolts if going all the way over to Lowe's would cost time and gas, even though the Depot supports the reelection campaign of Rep. Elise Stefanik (N.Y.),  who in turn supports the white-supremacist “great replacement” conspiracy theory. 

That reminds me, I might need nuts for those lag bolts.

No, I can overlook a certain amount of corporate politics just because I am not apt to align with any huge profit machine. My objection to CFA is simple: their food disgusts me. Greasy slabs of chicken on a spongy hamburger roll? No thanks. 

So I say, I don't go there, and I don't think they care. But here is another reason to view them with a gimlet eye.

One of their "stores" in North Carolina tried a new way to get their work done. They asked for “volunteers” willing to be paid in crummy chicken sandwiches, rather than money, for working at their drive-through.

“We are looking for volunteers for our new Drive Thru Express!” the outlet in Hendersonville, N.C., put on Facebook the other day (and then they took it down).  “Earn 5 free entrees per shift (1 hr) worked. Message us for details.”

This sort of "volunteer employee" status would appear to conflict with the Fair Labor Standards Act (FLSA), the federal law that says employers have to pay employees for the work they do.  You really wouldn't think such a law would be necessary, but then again...

The CFA in question says this is not a job, so sireee Bob! This is a “volunteer-based opportunity” intended for people who “think it’s a good fit for them,” so that ain't like no job or nothin'.

“We’ve had multiple people sign up and enjoy doing and have done it multiple times,” the store posted. “People who sign up for this chose it voluntarily.”

A spokesperson for Chick-fil-A corporate, down in their Atlanta headquarters, told The Washington Post that the Hendersonville store had “decided to end this program.”

“Most restaurants are individually owned and operated, and it was a program at an individually owned restaurant,” the spokesperson said in a statement. “This was not endorsed by Chick-fil-A, Inc.”

Meanwhile, the manager at the said he had no comment, and suggested that the medic contact the corporation...the same people who said go ask him. 

Jennifer Haigwood, director of communications for the North Carolina Department of Labor, said the FLSA’s requirements regarding private for-profit employers “are clear that there cannot be an employee who provides ‘volunteer’ work for that for-profit employer.”

“Generally, labeling a worker as a ‘volunteer’ will not remove the employer from its FLSA obligation to pay the required wages if that individual performs work that benefits the for-profit entity,” Haigwood said.

The CFA in question once employed Madison Cawthorn, recently unelected for a second term in the US Congress. Now that he will be out of work soon, perhaps volunteering at his old place will help him land a solid job that he can keep for more than two years!

Back home here, I am compiling a list of dream jobs I would like to volunteer for:

  • Orioles first-base coach
  • Being the "Big Al" elephant-suited mascot at Alabama football games
  • Beef taster at Ruth's Chris
  • Grand Ole Opry singer
  • Circuit Court judge
  • Graffiti installer
  • Game show host or booth announcer ("It's a lifetime supply of Turtle Wax!")
  • Tattoo parlor spell checker
  • MaĆ®tre d' at a fancy steak restaurant where bigshots vying for a table will palm me folded double-sawbucks
  • Fortune cookie writer
  • Roller coaster tester
  • Google Street View driver
  • Professional, paid blogger
And that's when I woke up.

 

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