Monday, November 23, 2015

Fun and Games in Pittsburgh

Oakland Raiders player Aravious "Ray-Ray" Armstrong, 24, is in trouble in Pennsylvania. His offense?  He lifted his jersey and pounded his chest at a dog who was attending the game at mustard-colored Heinz Field in Pittsburgh.

To be correct, the dog was at the game because he is a police K-9 pooch whose handler was on duty there. I mean, who would choose to go to a game there?

It is a third degree felony in that state to taunt a police dog.

Deputy Maria Watts told a Pittsburgh TV station that Armstrong was hollering, "Hey dog!  Hey dog!" as he came out of the locker room for the pregame merriment.  The dog, known as Bandit, became agitated at this, so Armstrong toyed with it a bit more. And then Deputy Watts filed charges.

This increased the dog's angst level, which was already considerable to begin with that day, considering that Michael Vick was also there.

Two things about this:  a) when I walk around our neighborhood I encounter two dogs within fences who bark their fool heads off as I ankle by.  My customary reaction is to bark back at them.  I speak fluent dog.  And this generally settles them down, as they are not used to having people speak their language.

2) it is so good to know that all the crime in Pixburgh is under control and that no miscreants are at large, thus allowing Deputy Watts to pursue felony charges against a man for speaking to a dog. 

My free advice to Ray-Ray's attorney would be to point out that Bandit The Dog needs glasses, so how can we be sure that Armstrong is the one who called him a dog?

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