Drop It Low

We've all heard of flying squirrels, which are just squirrels with a capelike flap from their front paws to their torsos, which enables them to glide from a tree branch to wherever.

We've all heard of flying fish, those fish who jump out of the water and dive right back in, so they don't "fly" in the technical sense of the word, either.

The Flying Dutchman is a ghost ship in maritime lore, which is supposedly doomed to sail the seas forever. Sail, not fly.

What we often call a fruit bat is known as a flying fox in far-flung outposts such as Australia. At least these guys fly!

What brings up all this flying talk is the preponderance of television commercials for restaurants in which food is just flying through the air. Chili's, TGI Friday's, Wendy's, Red Lobster, no matter whose spot you see, there are pieces of sliced red pepper or french fries or breaded soon-to-be-fried chunks o'chicken just plummeting earthward, bouncing out of fry vats and onto plates brought to you by people who look like they're never even BEEN in a chain eatery, let alone work in one.

And how many of us have eaten a crispy, batter-coated fried green bean? But here they come, falling from somewhere up above, landing on the plate, being dunked into dip and consumed by a happy bunch of people who are really having the time of their lives at Friday's!

Next time you're watching tv, check and see how much food there is dropping and bouncing and getting merry like Thanksgiving. We were with friends once, waiting for a booth at Chili's, and it took about an hour or so, as we sat there in the tiny anteroom that serves as a holding pen for the Great Unseated and Unserved. The only things that were dropping out there in the foyer were starving, unfed, would-be patrons. I was so hungry, I even would have eaten a fried string bean.

Or not.