Tuesday, July 31, 2018

The sign says "Drive Like Your Kids Live Here," not "Drive Like Your Kids."

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Peggy and I couldn't help but notice the juxtaposition on the front page of the SUN paper the other day. "Woman Held In Fatal Crash" concerns Callie Noble Schwarzman, 22, whom police identify as the driver of a Kia Sorento that ran over and killed a woman and her 5-year-old granddaughter last Monday morning.

Deborah Limmer and her granddaughter, Delaney Gaddis, were out for their customary morning stroll at about a quarter to seven when death came for them in the form of Scharwarzman's inability to control her car.  Police say there was evidence of alcohol and a controlled dangerous substance in the vehicle, and Schwarzman has now been charged with DUI for a second time. She has only had her license for three years, and yet her record is replete with nearly two dozen traffic violations in that time.

And now come these charges in last week's tragedy:



  • Driving under the influence of alcohol
  • Driving while impaired by alcohol
  • Driving while so far impaired by drugs/ drugs and alcohol that cannot drive safely
  • Driving while impaired by controlled dangerous substance
  • Negligent manslaughter by automobile (two counts)
  • Homicide by motor vehicle while impaired by alcohol (two counts)
  • Homicide by motor vehicle while impaired by drugs (two counts)
  • Homicide by motor vehicle while impaired by controlled dangerous substances (two counts)


 Clearly, this woman, if she ever gets out of prison, should never drive again.

But look at the paper! While some say she was not jailed before for her past offenses because the jails and prisons are full up, the paper says otherwise. Lots of room in there, so come on, legal system! If people cannot behave, away they go.

If Schwarzman had taken a pistol or a baseball bat or a deadly toxin and killed that grandmom and the little girl, she'd sure as hell be going up for a long time.  We need to stop overlooking driving while impaired as "just a little mistake everyone makes" and start jamming people up for doing it.

And finally, before I climb off this high horse, did you also see the little blurb on the front page "Cook Seeks Work Release"? That's our Pixilated Preacher, the Boozy Bishop, Heather Cook, who was drunk driving and texting a couple of years ago as she careered down Roland Av, killed a guy on a bike, and ran home in her car, hoping no one would notice what she left behind. To date she has uttered not one word of contrition, but now is asking to be sprung from Jessup to do work release.

Stay put, Your Disgracefulness. There's plenty of room in prison for you. In fact, you might want to put together a welcome basket for Callie Schwarzman.

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