Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Tip Top

I'm not giving away any secrets by sharing this list, which I first saw someone else share.  It's from a site called Tickld, which I never heard of, and it proposes to give some hints for success as a man. But, I say a lot of them are useful advice for either gender, any age, whatever.  Let me tell you what I mean.  I'll add some comments of my own in redso when things stop making sense, you'll know why.

Go for someone you perceive to be "out of your league." You'll surprise yourself. Single people! You always hear that the really great looking person you're angling toward is sitting home on date night because everyone assumes they are already busy, so they don't ask them out.  This is a rumor started by extremely good-looking people so they can be left alone with their fabulous jet-set lifestyles.

Never hit anyone unless they are an immediate threat. I'll add the words of Harold Ramis in "Stripes": Never hit anyone unless you're absolutely SURE you can get away with it.  

Every hat should serve a purpose. This is why I have no berets. They have no sun visor, and don't protect your ears from the sun. 

Never go to the movies on the first date. It's good to try something a little different, a little quirky.  Why not go down to the BagUrSelf Supermarket and watch them unload the freight truck?  

Always look a person in the eye when you talk to them. Absolutely! What's worse than someone looking at your feet while you're trying to talk to them?  Except if you're a shoe salesperson.  Then check out their Birkenstocks and try to move them up to Steve Maddens, or at least, John Maddens.  

Buy a plunger before you need a plunger. You'll always be glad when things are backing up and running down the hall that you have the tool to deal with it somewhere...somewhere...but where? WHERE?  

Never wear a clip-on tie. This is not good advice for people in occupations in which other people might want to grab them by the necktie and throttle them, such as police officers, jail guards, and oral surgeons.  

Give a firm handshake. I heard this advice a million times: "Don't give someone a wet fish to shake hands with" and finally I realized that fish don't have hands anyway.  

Compliment a love interest on their clothing choice. I used to have an old pair of yellow sweat pants, cut off at the knees, that I used for painting so often that they looked like Joseph's Pants Of Many Colors. I left them right downstairs. I haven't seem them for years.  

Keep a change of clothes at the office. Heck, if you can, keep another shirt, jacket and pants in your trunk.  It can't so any harm, but you just might be glad to have backup pants one day.  That doesn't sound right.  

Buy high quality tools, so you only have to buy them once. Good advice for the most part.  But there are plenty of tools you can get for a dollar at Dollar Tree that are just as good as what you'd pay top dollar for at Costington's, so there you are.  

When you walk, look straight ahead, not at your feet. I used to see people wandering around the cubicle farm where I worked and not paying attention to anything but their own shoes.  Oh, what a surprise, when someone crossed their path.  

No matter their job or status in life, everyone deserves your respect. What other people have learned or accomplished or helped with or seen might surprise you, and religions other than your own have millions of believers.  It doesn't take a brain surgeon to understand that.  Oooops.  

Do what needs to be done without complaining. It won't help speed things up.  It's good to see people who approach massive tasks - clearing rubble and rebuilding small midwestern towns devastated by tornadoes, cleaning dishes and putting everything away after a Turkey and Oyster Dinner at a firehouse, or helping tens of thousands survive after fleeing a civil war in their homeland - who turn to those tasks with a minimum of handwringing and a maximum of hands-on work. 

Never stop learning.  I once heard of a man of a modest station in life who had been in England during World War II and became interested in the days of the Roman Conquest of England. He read everything he could find about those days and saved his money to go to historic sites to explore.  You never know everything, but you can learn almost everything.

Don't change yourself just to make someone happy, unless that someone is you.  The people who wrote this list put a star on this tip to designate it as the most valuable one. I agree, this is good, and I see young people willing to do anything to try to please some dude or dudess who wouldn't offer them a Kleenex if they sneezed. So, don't.  Be you, and be the best you can be you.  

Luck favors the prepared. Branch Rickey, who brought Jackie Robinson to the big leagues, had a saying: "Luck is the residue of design."  Ever notice how the "lucky" people are also the ones who aren't sitting around watching "Gomer Pyle" all day long?

No one is on their deathbed wishing they spent more time at work. Enjoy your life. Think of Ebenezer Scrooge all year, not just on Christmas Eve.  Do your work, whatever it takes to put a meal over your head and a roof on the table in front of you.  Or the other way around.  But enjoy the meal and be thankful for the roof, and go live a little.

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