Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Just in the nick of Prison Time

Mercantile establishments, such as credit unions where police are members and therefore tend to be in the building cashing checks and turning peanut butter jars filled with coins into folding money, tend not to have to worry about the criminal element hanging around because of that very police presence.

The first rule they teach you in Crime School is to commit your crimes in areas where you have 1/2 a chance to get away with it without getting pinched, nabbed, booked, bagged, busted, collared, popped, nailed, nicked or pinched by a copper in a prowl car who will take you back to headquarters and wise you up but quick.

(I really have to spend less time watching old movies on TCM.)

Not guilty (yet)
I bring all of this advice about where NOT to commit a crime by way of introducing you to Master Criminal (ALLEGED!!!) Nicholas Ishmael.  Up until last Tuesday, Nick was a Baltimore County Police Cadet, in which position he was working in the evidence room, where seized materials are stored awaiting trial and/or their eventual return to their rightful owner.  Nick was not the rightful owner of the items in the evidence room, but he made fools of the people who recommended him for the job by ripping off drugs and money, including cocaine and 3,000+  Oxycodone tablets from the evidence room where he worked in a position of trust.

Nick is 20, and there's a good chance that on the day he can legally buy himself a glass of beer in Maryland, he will be locked up in a place with no beer.

It's funny, to think about it.  He was so sure of himself and his criminal mastermind larceny skills that when he was arrested in the police parking lot, he was carrying $40,000 in cash in a backpack.

Don't get caught eating caramels in your dentist's waiting room. Don't send a message that says "I love you more and more everyday" if you're dating an English teacher, and for the love of Pete, don't try to steal stuff from a building filled with police officers and detectives.

They tend to know what you're up to!

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