Monday, July 23, 2012

Getting your goat

From where I sit, it's only about 165 miles to the Atlantic Coast, which is comforting, as it seems that the farther west one goes, the less this one can figure things out.  Witness this story from northern Utah, where a man has chosen to dress in a goat suit and run around with a herd of wild goats.

There he is!
All right. I know it's Monday, so I'll repeat that verbatim.  A man has chosen to dress in a goat suit and run around with a herd of wild goats.

This story tells the story.  Phil Douglass, with the Wildlife Resource people out there, points out that it's legal to hunt goats out there, although he does not say why anyone would want to. I always thought that man hunted for food.  But sometimes, that's not enough, as Woody Allen said: there must also be a beverage.  For the record, I am not interested in a McGoat sandwich.

Mountain Goat
And beside the possibility of being shot by Ted Nugent, there must be several unpleasant aspects about living among goats.  One would be the smell, two, the braying, and number three, the dietary restrictions.  According to Wikipedia, "mountain goats are herbivores and spend most of their time grazing. Their diet includes grasses, herbs, sedges, ferns, moss, lichen, twigs and leaves from the low-growing shrubs and conifers of their high-altitude habitat."

The flamboyant Mr Nugent
Great.  So when Saturday night rolls around, and this guy wants to cut loose a little and order in some General Tso Chicken or a Triple Cheese Steak pizza, what happens? He gets outvoted, because the rest of the herd wants lichens. Again.

And, while people are calling the wildlife folks, saying, "Leave Goat Man alone," the wildlife folks are worrying that the goats will turn against the interloper and headbutt him back into the last century.

And that's the latest news from northern Utah.

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