Thursday, April 19, 2012

Bully for him

Well sir, today is going to be a great day for some lucky Secret Serviceperson, probably one of the few who aren't busy settling their tabs with Colombian hookers.  Someone is going to draw the short straw and wind up having to fly to Ardmore, Oklahoma, where formerly-popular, camo-clad entertainer Ted Nugent will continue his downslide to oblivion by performing for some kids who wish to plunk down their hard-earned money to hear ancient songs such as "Wango Tango," "The Great White Buffalo," and "Cat Scratch Fever."

To tell you the truth, no one on the planet would give a sweet shot about Nugent, who has not been popular since about 1979 (the year the Shah fled Iran, most likely as a result of hearing "Yank Me, Crank Me" one time too many) except for his engaging habit of making a verbal patootie of himself.  He advocates clubbing a woman who worked for the Fund For Animals, calling her all sorts of vile names.  He once took up with a 17-year-old Hawaiian girl and inveigled her parents to make him her legal guardian, yuck.

But now the Not-So-Secret Service needs to talk to him because he told the Nat'l Rifle Ass'n last week that he would be "dead or in jail" next year if President Obama is re-elected in November.

Seeking an intelligent discourse, Nugent appeared on conservative radio host Glenn Beck's show on Wednesday, where he found no such thing.  But Beck did ask if he had heard from the Secret Service.

"We actually have heard from the Secret Service, and they have a duty, and I salute them. I support them and I'm looking forward to our meeting tomorrow," Nugent said.

At the gun-lovers' convention, Nugent spoke thus of the Obama Administration:

"We need to ride into that battlefield and chop their heads off in November."

But on Beck's radio show, Nugent said he was not calling for violence.

"Every reference I made, whether it's a shot across the bow or targeting the enemy, it always ended the sentence with 'in November at the voter booth,'" Nugent told Beck.

Except that it didn't.

The Willard "Mitt" Romney for President campaign has been granted the coveted Ted Nugent endorsement.  One of Willard's sons, Tagg or Tapp or some other silly name, was all worked up because now his father has both Nugent and Kid Rock in his corner as he tries to be elected president in November.

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