Saturday, November 19, 2011

Third-grade NASCAR

Delaware is an interesting little state.  If you're reading this in, say, Idaho, well you just aren't used to little states like we have back here.  Notice how it's sort of squeezed in between Maryland and New Jersey, and the Jersey Shore seems to be poking its finger at Lower Delaware.  Yes, Delaware, the First State, as they like to be called, or The State Where They Almost Elected Christine O'Donnell to the Senate, as they like to forget, has some fun stuff going on.  As witness this from channel 16 in nearby Salisbury MD:

DOVER, Del.- A Dover woman is facing charges following accusations that she let her 9-year-old son drive her car to school. 

Tammy Oneal, 34,  was taken into custody on Wednesday by Dover police on a warrant charging her with reckless endangering and second-degree endangering the welfare of a child.

According to police, Oneal's arrest stemmed from an incident in which Oneal let her son get behind the wheel of a 1990 Toyota Corolla. Investigators said that with Oneal as the passenger, the child drove the car the quarter-mile from their home to West Reilly Brown Elementary School. 

Police said that after a witness observed Oneal's son exit the driver's seat in the parking lot, school authorities were notified and authorities were contacted.
Oneal was arrested on the aforementioned charges and later released on $1,000 unsecured bond.

OK? They live a quarter-mile from the school - 1320 feet! - and her son needs to get to school in a car?  That's my first thing.  Why is this child not walking to school?  I mean, unless Christine O'Donnell >>> and her witchy coven live along the path, he ought to be on foot on that path.  If Ms O'D does live there, yes, "Hop in the car, son; we don't want another Hansel and Gretel thing going on."

Second, Tammy, what were you thinking? WERE you thinking?  Even in a quarter of a mile, bad things can happen, and even though many drivers drive like they were nine years old, we don't need REAL nine-year-olds adding to the roadway havoc.

And one more thing...a 1990 Corolla?  Unless it has this cool patriotic color scheme, no kid wants to be seen in a ride that beat.  Tell Junior to get good grades and buy you a new machine.

I have a feeling that he's going to need good grades anyway.

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