Military Madness

Here's a scene you've seen a thousand times: Someone is sleeping soundly when suddenly, the door bursts open and a dozen beefy cops or soldiers burst in and there is a mass clicking sound as rifles are readied for action and the object of the sudden interrogation appears from beneath the sheets....

And in the movies, they always have the right guy and he is taken into custody and charged with violations of Title15 U.S. Code § 1825.

But sometimes in real life, which is different from the movies because no one really looks like Ben Affleck or Jennifer Lopez out here, sometimes, they get the wrong guy.

This is what happened in Boston last week: the FBI and the U.S. Army Special Operations Command were doing a training exercise at a hotel. In their play-acting scenario, soldiers and agents were supposed to bust into a room at 10 PM one night to take someone into custody for interrogation. A volunteer was in place in a room, all set to play the part of The Suspect.

As far as I know, that volunteer is still sitting in room 1425, watching The View and enjoying the view. Because, the Army people and the FBI people barged through the wrong door, taking the wrong person into custody, and subjecting that wrong person to 45 minutes of relentless questioning before finally deciding to check out his claim that he was a pilot for Delta Airlines.

Whoops!

At least no one was injured in the incident, except for the pride of the Army and the FBI. The pilot is lucky they didn't waterboard him, one supposes. 

"First and foremost, we'd like to extend our deepest apologies to the individual who was affected by the training exercise," said Lt. Col. Mike Burns, spokesperson for U.S. Army Special Operations Command, who went on to mansplain that this was "essential military training" that was "meant to enhance soldiers' skills to operate in realistic and unfamiliar environments.The training team, unfortunately, entered the wrong room and detained an individual unaffiliated with the exercise."

The FBI-Boston Division said personnel were "mistakenly sent" to the wrong room "based on inaccurate information" and that the pilot who was the guest of honor at this pajama party was "not the intended role player." I guess not; he was sound asleep in a room at the Revere Hotel at the time while these other guys were playing army.

Burns described the incident as "serious," adding that "The safety of civilians in [the] vicinity of our training is always our number one concern."

Yes sir!