One or the other, please

Well, I'm not much into doing film reviews, because I figure most people know what they like to see and what they don't.

And I rarely see the movies that everyone else is going to see. I don't care to go to the theater, where you have to pay a king's ransom to see "The King's Ransom." I love the old crime dramas and comedies from the olden days, and Turner Classic Movies beams them my way all day and all night.

Now, you'll notice, I said I like crime dramas AND comedies. In one evening, one could watch a gangster movie with Edward G. Robinson and then a comedy with Eve Arden.  It makes for a rounded evening of cinema fare.

What throws me off is when we watch something like "Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri," and it lives up to the review that David Edelstein gave it ("Tragicomedy, tragicomedy, tragicomedy mish-mash.) Seeing a movie that throws in humor along with a story about people's reactions to the brutal murder of a young women confuses me, like biting into a cheeseburger, only to find that the "cheese" is actually buttercream icing.

And - SPOILER ALERT - it's one of those movies in which they don't solve the crime! No, the point of the movie is not to show you how the cops chased down the killer, no sireee Bob. It's all about showing you how people FELT and how they REACTED to the agonizing crime, and I'm sitting there wishing that someone FELT LIKE solving the crime.

But it's all about feelings, and character development, and it left me feeling like when you have chicken but there's no hot sauce, or you're reading a magazine article in waiting room, only to find that someone before you ripped off the last page, and you never get to learn that Chester A. Arthur owned at least eighty pairs of pants.

I like Sam Rockwell and Frances McDormand, and I appreciate all they gave playing their parts in the movie.  After all, they didn't write it, so don't blame them for the story not being wrapped up tight. 

It's just that when you watch Lawrence Tierney in "The Devil Thumbs A Ride," you can count on knowing that justice will be done by the time your popcorn is.