Wells Fargo Wagon!

As a major fan of the TV cartoon Family Guy (and, some have said, an uncanny double for Stewie) I watch the episodes of that show with the same attention that an art lover might use while strutting through the Louvre. There's an episode in which dad Peter dances and sings the "Shipoopi" song from The Music Man while performing as a member of the New England Patriots.

Peggy, always the realist, points out that probably only a small percentage of the Family Guy audience has ever watched The Music Man and seen the original "Shipoopi," done by Buddy Hackett. It's a great movie; it tells the story of a con man whose game is bilking hick town residents out of money under the guise of organizing and training a boys' band. The angle is, he sells the instruments and uniforms, and then splits - usually. Go rent it and see how it plays out, or stop by: I have it on VHS and DVD, and the soundtracks (Broadway and movie) on LP and CD.

The story takes place in 1912 Iowa, and in one scene, the whole town of River City gets all worked up because the Wells Fargo wagon is rolling into town. That was sort of like the UPS or FedEX of its time, although there is some doubt as to whether or not the drivers wore shorts. But it's on my mind because I have a friend who is so sophisticated; she got a package from UPS the other day and did not bother opening it for some time. It turned out to be macaroons, instead of a textbook or something, but imagine being so cool that you get a package delivered and you just say, "I'll have to get around to opening that later on." I admire that coolness. Myself, I get all churned up when the US Mail truck shambles up our court. Who knows what might be in today's mail? A note from a long-lost friend? An invitation to a party, a wedding, a gathering of like-minded souls? This week's New Yorker? This week's Pennysaver, or Coupon Clipper, or Val-Pak (doesn't that sound like an antibiotic you have to take for 9 days straight?)

The mayor of River City calls people who live there the "Citizenians" of River City. Maybe they are so excited about the same thing that makes my heart leap when a package shows up:

lyrics to "Wells Fargo Wagon" by Meredith Willson:

First Voice

I got a box of maple sugar on my birthday.

Second Voice:
In March I got a gray mackinaw.

Third Voice:
And once I got some grapefruit from Tampa.

Fourth Voice:
Montgom'ry Ward sent me a bathtub and a cross-cut saw.

People:
O-ho the Wells Fargo Wagon is a-comin' now
Is it a prepaid surprise or C.O.D.

Fifth Voice:
It could be curtains!

Sixth Voice:
Or dishes!

Seventh Voice:
Or a double boiler!

Eighth Voice:
Or it could be

People:
Yes, it could be
Yes, you're right it surely could be

Eighth Voice:
Somethin' special

People:
Somethin' very, very special now

Eighth Voice:
Just for me!

People:
O-ho the Wells Fargo Wagon is a-comin' down the street.
Oh, don't let him pass my door!
O-ho the Wells Fargo
Wagon is a-comin' down the street
I wish I knew what he was comin' for.

Ninth Voice:
I got some salmon from Seattle last September.

Tenth Voice:
And I expect a new rockin' chair.

Eleventh Voice:
I hope I get my raisins from Fresno.

Quartet:
The D.A.R. have sent a cannon for the courthouse square!

So, I'm not cool. If that UPS truck pulls up out front, I'm gonna dash out there like Cindy McCain at a hair dye giveaway and see what Doug or Deacon have brought me! I hope it's somethin' special!