Say it!

A sad time...I've had a couple of deaths among friends and former coworkers in the past couple of weeks. I have one piece of advice to pass along for those who care to hear it, and that is, if you have something nice to say about someone, say it now!

I found out too late a few years ago that once a person is gone, they are gone, and with them has gone my last chance to say something to them face-to-face. So - if you have always thought someone was funny, enjoyable company, reliable in a tight spot, or good to be around when things were sad, tell them now! What the hell are you waiting for?

If you like how someone looks in their new sweater, why not let them know? If you appreciate how someone came through for you a couple of years ago when things looked bleak, they will likely be glad to hear about it. It might even encourage them to be there for someone else somewhere down the road.

I remember an essay by Bob Greene (the sometimes-corny former Chicago columnist, not Oprah's diet guru) in which he talked about a Japanese woman who had come here to go to college and, in a phys ed class, had trouble mastering the intricacies of setting a volleyball, until a kind person on her team touched her lightly on the shoulder and said,"You can do this." From that moment on, the student felt confident and capable. And that student? Well, sorry, I'm not Paul Harvey; I have no idea whatever happened to her, but I'll bet she went on to do things with a sense of capability. All because someone took a minute to say a kind word.

Sometimes, people who were just paid a compliment will look at you and say, "Do you really mean that?" Speaking for myself, I am not able to say things I don't mean. I cannot act, cannot take on any persona other than my own, so I make it a point to mean what I say and say what I mean.

And if you go on the theory that no matter what, there is always something good to say about everyone, well, that George Bush certainly keeps his hair looking well-groomed at all times.

There. I did it!