ET Phone Home

Ever have the feeling that there is a whole 'nother world right here with us?

As evidence, I offer the story that says over a million and a half people with nothing better to do have told Facebook that are "attending" an event scheduled for September 20 of this year at three o'clock in the morning.

The event is called "Storm Area 51, They Can't Stop All of Us." Area 51 is a test and training area in Nevada. Conspiracy theorists are under the impression that the United States government (led by a man who doesn't particularly believe in UFOs) has a lot of UFOs and extraterrestrials caged up in there.

Really.

You see, in 1947, in Roswell, New Mexico, before the US Air Force became a separate armed service, a US Army Air Forces balloon, sent aloft to do nuclear testing surveillance, crashed, and that's where the whole Unidentified Flying Object thing started.  For years thereafter, people were running around claiming that "little green men from Mars" had landed in America, demanding to be "taken to our leader."

I can understand why they are unwilling to do so currently.

But the US government spent 22 years and untold millions investigating the whole UFO deal. The result was, in official language, "Nada Zilch Zero Bupkis" -  none of it was real, and there was "no evidence indicating that sightings categorized as 'unidentified' were extraterrestrial vehicles," according to the Air Force.

And just to throw everyone off the track, the investigation, known as Project Blue Book, was conducted at Wright-Patterson Air Force Base in Ohio, not at area 51 in Nevada or at Roswell.

That'll show 'em!

So this massive meet-up is all set, per Facebook:

"We will all meet up at the Area 51 Alien Center tourist attraction and coordinate our entry," according to the Facebook page. "If we naruto run, we can move faster than their bullets. Lets [sic] see them [sic] aliens."

"Naruto run" refers to how Japanese anime character Naruto Uzumaki sprints around with his arms stretched behind him.  It is now known how running like a sandpiper is supposed to help these funseekers storm a government safeguard, but let them dream on.

Air Force spokesperson Laura McAndrews weighs in: "The United States Air Force is aware of the Facebook post. The Nevada Test and Training Range is an area where the Air Force tests and trains combat aircraft. As a matter of practice, we do not discuss specific security measures, but any attempt to illegally access military installations or military training areas is dangerous.”

This is not exactly like having everyone meet at the food court in the Galleria Mall to do one of those flash mob deals. This range covers 2.9 million acres of land and 5,000 square miles of airspace.  The airspace is restricted. Do not try to fly over it. The government doesn't want you seeing all those downed space ships from Mars and the strange visitors who rode them here, currently caged up and being fed Space Food Sticks left over from the 70s.

{Note to the editor - be SURE that last line is deleted! If that gets out, we're doomed!}