New 2022 words, part 1

OK, all you logophiles! 

I don't care what your religion is; I'm speaking to my fellow word lovers. Our early holiday is here! Merriam-Webster has published their list of the 30 new words they have crammed into their dictionary.

They don't let us know what words they have removed from their glossary, but I suspect that, among the words no longer deemed to be in use in the United States, we will find old favorites like "Spelling", "Grammar", and "Diction." But that's just I.

The words, and the definitions supplied: 

1. Adorkable: “Socially awkward or quirky in a way that is endearing.”

I believe this word was coined to describe Zooey Deschanel in her days on the "New Girl" situation comedy. I guess that in his day, Urkel fit the bill, and maybe Lisa Kudrow.

2. Altcoin: “Any of various cryptocurrencies that are regarded as alternatives to established cryptocurrencies and especially to Bitcoin.”

The same people who used to tell me they had foolproof betting systems for the racehorses are now telling me to try bitcoin. Still no.

3. Baller: “Excellent, exciting, or extraordinary, especially in a way that is suggestive of a lavish lifestyle.”

I thought it was someone who played ball or dressed as if they were going to. No one I know is lavish

4. Banh Mi: “A usually spicy sandwich in Vietnamese cuisine consisting of a split baguette filled typically with meat (such as pork or chicken) and pickled vegetables (such as carrot and daikon) and garnished with cilantro and often cucumbers.”

I'm disinclined to try this sandwich, as long as I live in a world where WaWa Italian hoagies and Pizza Sauce cheesesteaks are readily available. And I might live the rest of my life without daikon, whatever that is.

5. Cringe: “So embarrassing, awkward, etc. as to cause one to cringe: cringeworthy.”

This is another sad example of verbing weirding nouns. A perfectly good verb should stay in its lane. 

6. Dawn Chorus: “The singing of wild birds that closely precedes and follows sunrise especially in spring and summer.”

I'm up at 0515 every morning, but I know people who, for whatever reason, like to sleep later, and they do not appreciate the dawn chorus. Maybe once they learn that it has a name they will like it more. I doubt it.

7. FWIW: "Abbreviation for 'for what it’s worth.'"

OIC.

8. Galentine's Day: “A holiday observed on February 13th as a time to celebrate friendships especially among women.”

This is similar to February 15, also known as the Day Of Shame, when men who forgot the 14th desperately search for late gifts. It's never pretty.

9. Greenwashing: “The act or practice of making a product, policy, activity, etc. appear to be more environmentally friendly or less environmentally damaging than it really is.”

You can spot this on any advertisement that uses green ink for no good reason.

10. ICYMI: Abbreviation for “in case you missed it.”

I'm glad you didn't miss it; that would have been a real SNAFU.

11. Janky: “Of very poor quality: junky; also: not functioning properly or adequately: faulty.”

I've never heard this one, but I suppose it comes from the same process of word alteration that turned "stinky" into "stanky."

12. LARP “A live-action role-playing game in which a group of people enacts a fictional scenario (such as a fantasy adventure) in real time typically under the guidance of a facilitator or organizer.”

Hmmm. My entire life has been a live-action role-playing game and I didn't know there was a name for it.

13. Lewk: “A fashion look ... that is distinctive to the wearer and that is noticeable and memorable to others.”

Careful here. You're just one typo away from making "lewk" look "lewd."

14. MacGyver: “To make, form, or repair (something) with what is conveniently on hand.”

We used to say "jury-rigged," before MacGyver was a TV show.

15. Magnet Fishing: “The sport or hobby of using a strong magnet attached to the end of a rope to find metal objects in bodies of water.”

This was one of the ads in comic books back in the day, along with Charles Atlas body-building courses and lessons in ventriloquism. They sold you a "very powerful super magnet" and told you to take a boat out on a lake, drop the magnet in via a rope, and prepare to haul up used cars, guns, and Spanish doubloons. Ventriloquism, by the way, does not mean "throw your voice." It means "throw your money away."

More tomorrow!