Crushing it

As I slouch ever closer to dotard status myself, there is one thing I can always claim, and that is that I am almost always older than anyone else.

And age brings wisdom. Ask anyone who bought a Yugo. Very few bought a second. You don't see people in their 60s jumping off bridges or riding on the handlebars of a motorcycle racing around.

Oh sure, old man on the bumper of a moving school bus, yeah, but most people who have seen 60+ summers know better.

The reason I bring this up is to say that when young people ask my advice, I am very proud that they do, and I always honor their requests with total honesty. People get fed lies far too often, and I never want to be the one doing the feeding, so I don't.

Not so long ago, a young friend, a single girl, told me she felt bad because she had a crush on a male. Why did she feel bad? Because the people around her were telling her not to waste her time, that the guy would never pay her any attention, that she would be better off going after someone more attainable.

Well, as I told her, the heart wants what the heart wants! And especially that is true of a teenaged heart, which has not had the benefit of experience in the field of love. (Yes, it can take place in a field!)

A teenage crush, as long as it doesn't become a bizarre absorption, is a good way to practice for the day when old Cupid really shoots his arrows your way. To experience the fascination with another person is to sort of simulate the experience she (and everyone else, I hope) will enjoy when that right person comes along for real and forever.

Ever notice that we dream about things the opposite of what they really are? As in, we dream of working with people that we normally wouldn't hang with or we dream that that we are falling out of airplanes, sometimes landing on those people we don't want to be with. Crushes work the same - they allow us to "try on" something other than what we think we want.

I also advised my friend to keep her crush to herself. Like the regular package of Cracker Jacks, it's not meant to be shared by passing it around with your squad or telling the crushee about it.

Like one of those all-day lollipops, it's all the sweeter when you take your time to enjoy a crush. It doesn't hurt anyone, it allows you to experience loving feelings for the first time, and it will be something to look back on fondly in the years ahead.

At least, that's the way I feel about it. And I was honored to be asked.