Harissament

As Chief Cook and Bottle Emptier here at the Lazy 'C' Ranch, I'm always on the lookout for what to fix for dinner. We both like a certain number of things in common, but I have to steer clear of seafood, due to Peggy being allergic, and of course, my well-documented aversion to asparagus and beets is a matter of public record.

So, looking for something new, or more accurately, some new way to cook chicken, I spot a lot of things online, from the New York Times Food page to pages such as  "The Kitchn." 

And every time I see something that even sort of looks enticing, I always click on it, and like Charlie Brown seeing Lucy yank that football away, I am always fooled.

Yesterday, The Kitchn (that contrived spelling is becoming annoying!) promised to share "The Brilliant 4-Ingredient Chicken Dinner I Make When I Don’t Feel Like Cooking (Almost Every Week)" and, fool that I am, I couldn't stop my clicker finger from asking for the marvelous recipe that will take away hours of kitchen (!) drudgery and key me in to a recipe that will make both of us sing with joy as we lick our fingers after gobbling this tasty recipe.

And then I looked down, like someone who just realized he got gravy all over his favorite tie, and I saw the first drawback to the miracle I was promised. 

It's supposed to look like this. Notice the delicate chunks of harissa!

The first ingredient they mentioned was "harissa paste"! Really? Let me just retch up in the spice cabinet and grab my bottle of harissa paste. It should be right behind the Grains of Paradise, to the left of the Nigella sativa, behind the Asafoetida.

Sorry, Kitchn people. Fresh out of harissa paste here. I guess I used the last of the bottle I had on those harissaburgers last week, and I haven't gotten back to Spice-A-Rama to replenish my harissa.

I quit following Martha Stewart because she always seemed to assume that I had a lb. of Yak Butter in the icebox and half a quart of rhubarb hot sauce.

I guess instead of an Anthony Bourdain kind of guy, I'm more of an Anthony Boredom.

PS If you want to try the recipe, here's the link!